- Dr. Laura Crawshaw, PhD, from The Boss Whisperer
For further information on Dr. Crawshaw please visit the website
- Professor, Dr. Dieter Zapf from Frankfurt University, Work and Organizational Psychology
For further information on Professor, Dr. Dieter Zapf please visit the website
- Professor emiritus Töres Theorell from Karolinska Institutet in Stockholm
For further information on Professor emiritus Töres Theorell please visit the website
- Professor Suzy Fox, GPHR, MBA, PhD, from Loyola University Chicago
For further information on Professor Suzy Fox please visit the website
01 September 2011
Bullying 2012 - The 8th International Conference on Workplace Bullying & Harassment, University of Copenhagen, Denmark
30 August 2011
How to get rid of bitterness
It's impossible to avoid all events that could turn you bitter. At some point, all of us will be the victim of a crazy boss, a cheating spouse, a spiteful co-worker, or someone else who does us wrong. Some will be even more unlucky, and suffer physical or sexual abuse.
"There are situations where you'd have to be the Dalai Lama not to feel bitterness," says Raison, who writes regularly for CNN.com on the mind-body connection for health.
The key is how we react to these situations in the long term. Here are five tips for how to let go of bitterness as quickly as possible for the sake of your own health;
1. Gripe for a while
"Give yourself time to vent and get it out of your system," suggests Dr. Maryann Troiani, co-author of the book Spontaneous Optimism.
2. Watch the news
Frederic Luskin, director of the Stanford Forgiveness Project, tells his embittered patients to think about how many others have had bad things happen to them.
"I ask people to watch the news for a day, or read the paper, or go to work and talk to people, and they'll see that others have suffered and this is just a part of life," says Luskin, author of the book "Forgive for Good."
3. Consider confronting the person who's hurt you
Troiani says some of her patients have found solace in doing this. Other times, however, it can backfire. "Some ex-spouses are real psychopaths, and hunting them down can be disastrous," she says. "They'll just connive and twist things around and blame you." If that's your situation, try writing a letter to the person and reading it to a trusted friend, she suggests.
4. Realize you're only harming yourself
Keep reminding yourself of the all the physical harm you're doing yourself by remaining bitter. "I tell my patients, take care of this bitterness now, or in five years it will haunt you in the form of chronic headaches, fatigue, arthritis, and backaches," Troiani says.
5. Consider the other person's mental state
Author Maya Angelou has every reason to feel bitter. Raped as a child, then overwhelmed with guilt when her rapist, an uncle, was murdered by another family member, she was mute for several years. Still, she says she never felt bitterness toward her attacker. "Although he was a child molester and abused me, I never hated him, and I'm glad of that," she says. "What I realized is that people do what they know to do -- not what you think they should know." As an adult, she's continued that mind-set. "If someone hurts my feelings or hurts me in any way, I think, 'This dummy, that's all he knew,' and I'm not going to carry this bitterness around with me. I will not give it a perch. I will not give it a place to live in me because I know that's dangerous."
Don't be a doormat
Taking these steps and losing your bitterness does not mean you should be a doormat, Raison says. For example, consider the classic case of the wife whose husband leaves her for a much younger woman. Instead of feeling angry, she can think about moving on with her life and finding someone new. "What happens is that the husband who's been doing the 20-year-old comes crawling back because now his wife looks really good, and the wife can say, 'You're a day late and a dollar short,'" he says.
25 August 2011
24 August 2011
• Contact the company's employee assistance program. While acknowledging that some employees may fear word getting back to the bully, "you have to be able to take that risk because you're tired of feeling the way you're feeling," he says. "You need to be able to talk to an objective third party who knows how to deal with these kinds of issues."
• Tell human resources. While you don't have to provide the name of the bully, it's important to have a record so if you experience retaliation, you have proof that it took place after your complaint.
• Ask for dignity and respect. You don't have to launch into a litany of complaints but simply state you want fair treatment. This often prompts companies to bring in outside help to educate and train supervisors and employees. source
10 August 2011
Things both good and bad happen in our careers that we do not expect and have not planned for. The idea that we plan our careers by thinking carefully and logically about what best suits us and then simply implementing our strategy is probably the most commonly held view of how our careers work.
"Plastics" was the career advice given by a well-meaning family friend to Dustin Hoffman in the film The Graduate. The 1967 movie reflected the societal expectation that all graduates (and school leavers) should have a clear and firm plan for their lives.
This expectation is pretty much still in place today, but should it be?
When we start looking closely at careers as real people genuinely experience them and not as some mythologised logical, linear and ever-upward trajectory, a different picture emerges. It turns out that careers are a lot less predictable than we imagine.
Think about your own career - is what you are doing now, what you believed you'd be doing when you were 15 or 21? The career path of most of us better resembles a drunken man's stagger through the world of work than a neat, calculated and straight line. Careers are riddled with chance events. They are also subject to a complex array of different influences. Career decisions are not the result of cold, rational and logical thought processes, rather they emerge from a melting pot of personal history, circumstance, interests, experiences and more.
The rise of foreign economies has dispossessed many Australian workers. Whether it is using an iPad to order your meal in a restaurant, driving a Chinese car, or sending your dictation to India to be typed, the way we work, and hence our careers, are changing continually.
Here are some facts about careers and their trajectories:
■ At least 70 per cent of us will experience a chance event that significantly alters our career.
■ A US study found that over a period of 25 years about 60 per cent of us will change occupations and will report higher levels of well-being because of it.
■ A 2005 report from Monash University showed that after one year 29.7 per cent of enrolling students had changed courses, universities or had dropped out.
■ Federal government figures suggest 26.2 per cent of apprentices dropped out in 2009-2010.
We may think we make our own decisions about our careers but all of the following factors have been shown to be influential in our choices: where you live, your mother, your father, your siblings, politicians, the media, the web, your health and injuries. What all this means is that shift happens in our careers continually.
Emerging from the complex interaction of all these different things will be a career pattern that has periods of stability but is subject to unpredictable and sometimes radical change. The appropriate reaction to the complexity of our lives and careers is to place more emphasis on learning the skills of planning - how to make a plan, how to change a plan, how to copy someone else's plan and how and when to abandon a plan. It means developing the skills and mindset to embrace uncertainty and realising that unplanned events - both good and bad - are inevitable. This will help us to be resilient and persistent in the face of bad-chance events and ready to take advantage of any good-chance events that come our way.
Those who react to uncertainty by trying to control and predict everything by risking nothing are likely to be either confounded in their efforts by the forces of change and complexity, or they will limit their careers to such an extent they risk never fulfilling their potential. Successful people live their careers on the edge of chaos, a place where they are sufficiently open to change to engage, learn and transform.
Perhaps we should adopt the approach of Peter Ustinov who said, ironically, on his 75th birthday: "I really must decide what to do with my life."
20 July 2011
Having fought their way into the boardroom they are a match for any man.
But a study has shown that when women bosses try to 'act like a man' and copy aggressive management styles it actually has the opposite effect - with staff working under so-called 'alpha females' less likely to co-operate to get results.
Researchers at the University of London found that women in the boardroom who suppress their natural skills in dealing with people can become confrontational, and would fare better from drawing on typical feminine qualities of sensitivity and good communication.
Alpha female: A new study reveals that to get better results women, instead of striving to be like men in the workplace, should draw on their inherent qualities
The researchers studied the management styles of senior professionals within five NHS hospitals but say their findings could be applied to any profession.
Their results showed that some senior female managers had moved away from what was called 'healthy assertiveness' and were instead attempting to 'emulate aggressive male models'.
Findings: The study showed more aggressive women annoyed colleagues and achieved less
Professor Paula Nicolson, from the University of London, said: 'The best managers had more 'emotional intelligence'.
But women who were trying to behave like they thought men behaved were the ones who got it wrong.
'It’s almost like women feel they must 'act like a man' and overly develop traits often associated with power-hungry City traders.
'This is understandable, because previously leaders have been male.
'But women's leadership style ought to come into its own when dealing with people and displaying skills in communication, judgment, sensitivity and psychological insight – all traits needed to be a good leader.'
WHEN ARE YOU MOST STRESSED?
The most stressful time of the day for modern mothers is 5.55pm, say researchers
That is the point when they are usually rushing around trying to cook dinner in time to ferry the children to their after-school clubs.
Bathtime, at 7.15pm, was the second most stressful point in a mother’s day, with the children’s bedtime at 8.45pm coming third.
The school run, around 8.20am, was fourth.
The study of 2,000 mothers, commissioned by bathroom retailer Betterbathrooms.com, also found that more than half of mothers lose their temper at some point during the day.
A similar number confessed to serving up unhealthy food because they didn’t have the time to cook something from scratch.